Paris

It's absolutely heartbreaking. This world is so tragic. It's clear that there is so much love in the world as the world is showing their support and praying for the "act of war" in Paris. But why on earth is this happening? It's disgusting, bombing the most beautiful city, of love and breaking thousands of hearts how dare they. 

I'm petrified. My heart hurts, I can't believe that there are people who are capable of such massacre. Its revolting, why is this happening what do they honestly think they'll achieve from this. It's fucking hideous that they've targeted innocent people, families, couples and children. It's horrific they were probably having the the best night of their lives and I imagine some of them even said those exact words and these sick people destroyed their whole life, merciless. They probably were counting down the days until the match or the concert all for their precious lives to end tragically. 

Can you imagine the horror, being there, knowing you probably won't survive. I think even the thought of knowing I was going to die so gruesomely and knowing I'll never see the faces of the people I love, the pain of never seeing my family, never telling people how much I love and appreciate them enough, no future, the thought of that alone could kill me. The fear in that moment would be absolutely sickening. 

I can't imagine how these peoples families and loved ones feel at this horrible time. All I know is that you were probably their last thought and the whole world is thinking of you and praying for Paris. I'm honestly scared for my life because it can be gone in an instant. I hope and pray to God that this all ends and western countries stick together and never give in. Were stronger than them. Please don't start war, love and respect everyone, don't be stereotypical and racist because that's what they want. Spread love and we can try our very best so not let their hopeful "Great War" happen. 

Be safe and careful. 

Thank you for reading  

My thoughts are with Paris and everywhere and anyone affected by the terrorist attacks. 

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:

INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant

TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant

Affairs

I have been SO busy over the past two weeks, back I'm back on track and will have my Wednesday and Sunday posts for you guys! (If you even noticed I wasn't posting LOL)

I got asked on tumblr what my views on affairs were, so sit tight. 

Cheating/affairs to me are literally the highest form of betrayal there is.

When I was 6 years old my dad had an affair, it completely tore my families world apart, it was hideous. Growing up was so difficult, having to get used to this new woman and not fully understanding what was going on. My mum moved to Kent but I stayed living with my dad until I was 12/13. I missed her too much so I left Essex and started a second, secondary school (which was so hard for me as I find it daunting meeting new people and get very anxious about it). It seriously ruined a big chunk of my childhood. Moving away from my best friend and knowing I'd hardly ever see her, Christmas was now difficult, different and awkward, half living with my mum, then my dads at weekends and vise-versa. Just not having that family feel that I craved. I've always been a daddy's girl and it was all pretty unbearable. That was just the effect it had on me, I cannot imagine how that could have been for my mum (of three young children at the time) losing somebody she loved enough to marry, the father of her children and become a single parent. To have my elder sister grow up super fast and become a somewhat father figure to me and my younger sister, everything good just seemed to vanish. It was hard. And it still is 12 years on. I don't understand how you could do that. 

If you want somebody else, leave. HOW can you live with yourself knowing you've got somebody else at home who loves you. It destroys peoples trust and faith in you, and as a result weakens the other person emotionally and I think it's sick. Having an affair whilst you're married is the lowest form of an affair, to have a secret passionate relationship when you've vowed to love somebody else forever is so fucked up, it really is.

I couldn't live with myself knowing I had ruined a love. I get that people do fall out of love but leave that person before you get with someone else, don't lie to somebody who loves you. People may come across as strong but I think having somebody do that to you could break anybody.

If you want somebody else, don't destroy somebody else in the process. Although it may be hard to end a relationship because you don't want to hurt them, it's much better to be truthful than ruin that persons relationships in the future and hurt them way more than a break up would. Where is your conscience? How can you live with that guilt? It really makes me sad that people can be that careless. 

Don't waste peoples time in getting into a relationship if you're not going to be committed. If you like freedom and being with different people, don't get into a relationship. Don't be stupid. If you're not happy in a relationship, you have every right to want to find somebody else,  but end it before you start again. I mean I know that cheating and having an affair are slightly different, as an affair is usually a repeated sequence but either way you're unfaithful and I think is awful. I really do, to go behind somebody's back who loves you is a hideous thing to do

Although I am viciously against unfaithfulness, I am a strong believer in that 'everything happens for a reason' and if my dad didn't do what he did I wouldn't be the person I am today. Not that I'm thankful that he did that, I'll never forgive him, but I like my life now and I'm happy where I am. But it should have never of happened and I still remember that night of a screaming match between my parents and how afraid and confused me and my sisters were, all three of us sitting at the top of the stairs crying, contemplating whether we should go down stairs or not. I don't think I'll ever forget that night.

After watching the Doctor Foster series I am even more against affairs.

Affairs are horrid. Don't be that person. 

Thanks for the question, what do you want next?

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:

INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant

TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant