Girls

Girls can be, and often are, the worst most horrible specimens to grace our earth. However, I am not here to talk about that kind of girl. I want to talk about the rare kind, the diamonds in the rough, hidden gems and best kept secrets. The girls who praise other girls. The ones who compliment one another. And most importantly, and the reason for this post, the ones who protect one another.

In this day and age I find that a lot of us are anxious, even the most confident of girls get uncomfortable with unwanted male attention. I think I speak on behalf of the majority of girls with the fact that 'oi oi' isn't as flattering as you may intend it to be, no means NO and it is NEVER okay to cross boundaries and touch us. (By that I do not mean 'I'm too prestige', I mean it as in inappropriately). My honest favourite feeling is when a girl senses your discomfort and literally saves you. I've read some lovely stories of when a girl has helped another girl out in a distressing situation so I thought I'd write about mine. 

A while a go I was on my lunch break. I usually spend these sitting alone, on a bench and listening to my music in my own little world because I find the staff room horrendously awkward. I had my bag in between myself and another girl.  Unfortunately, my 15 minutes were coming to an end when this guy came over and asked me if it was okay to sit where my bag was. Me, thinking nothing of it happily moved my little black bag and got ready to leave (as I needed to go back to work). He then said ''I actually came over because I thought you were beautiful''. I, very awkward and easily embarrassed, thanked him very much, he then continued to ask for my number, me, being uninterested, (and believe seeing somebody at the time) declined, explained why, apologized and then said that I needed to get back to work. My rejection must have hit a nerve, as he started to question it, called me a bitch because he thought going back to work was a getaway excuse. At this point I got a little stressed out and felt hideously uncomfortable, baring in mind that my music was still playing in one ear so in my tizz I couldn't really hear how rude he was being. My hands began shaking slightly and my chest swelled up in its usual manner. I honestly needed to get back to work I proclaimed, as he continued to, I guess, harass me. He then abruptly stood up and stormed off. A heavy weight was instantly lifted off of my shoulders. The girl on the other side of the bench was obviously listening in. I got up to go, when she stopped me to ask if I was okay, my initial response was 'Yes I'm okay thank you' although that salty water was rapidly developing.  It was nothing major what she did next but to me in the moment its all I needed. ''Are you sure you're okay? Did you want me to walk you back to work?'' Although I said that I'd be alright, the fact that she offered to somewhat, protect me, until I was safe was the most gratifying feeling. I felt so lucky, her words made me feel safe, I am still so thankful to this day.

Another, more recent act of kindness was on an exceptionally cold Saturday night. McDonald's decided that it would be a fantastic idea to lock a large group of intoxicated, hungry and fairly rowdy, cold teens outside until there was no queues inside. But, of course, there were a few middle aged, foreign men packed within the group. Whilst huddling up to my best friend two men behind us were getting unpleasantly close. One of them then put both hands on my shoulders and somewhat shook me and said ''you must be cold''. My face must have pictured how distressed I was. A girl who was with us, who I'd only met a few times and spoke to briefly so naturally wrapped her arms around me and gripped my hands until they opened the doors. It was so selfless. She's probably doesn't even remember doing it, but to me she is a literal angel.

So thank you, to all the lovely girls who have ever helped, protected or comforted girls when they are insecure. You're worth your own weight in gold.

Thank you for reading,

Apologies for the HUGE lack of posts, I should be back on track for weekly posts, I hope.

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:
INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant
TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant

Unrequited Love

I'm a hopeless romantic. I love, love, honestly it is my favourite thing. I have for as long as I can remember. Could be star sign related, or could just be because I'm a loser. But, I love seeing people in love, I love watching love films, well, crying, at love films, hearing about love, and of course, being in love. I love the passion, thoughtfulness. It's indescribable; and I love it.

Unrequited love; the worst, most treacherous feeling in the world. Being desperately in love with someone who doesn't love you back. Nothing is worse than the complete agony of loving somebody who just sees you as another person. It could be that they don't want you in the way you want them, or the other person could be completely oblivious to the way you feel about them.

It's a feeling that I hate and somewhat love at the same time. I think the admiration is lovely but despise the way somebody can make you physically feel weak. It's crazy how a person can make my legs tremble and my whole body shake because of the burning passion I have towards them. I can't decide if I think the feeling of being so passionate about another person is beautiful or dangerous. I think everybody should have somebody who is completely and utterly obsessed with them.

''The exquisite pain of wanting someone so unattainable'' - Sex and the City. One of the greatest TV series in the history of all TV series. I've seen every episode countless times but no other part of the series has stuck out at me more than this quote. Because it is exquisite. Unrequited love is bitter sweet, although it tends to be painful I think the idea of admiring somebody with or without them acknowledging your feelings is pretty beautiful. There is nothing wrong with one sided love, because the feeling of love is so great in itself.

Just remember to ''Never apologize for how you feel. No one can control how they feel. The sun doesn’t apologize for being the sun. The rain doesn’t say sorry for falling. Feelings just are.''

Love is love.
Thank you for reading,

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:
INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant
TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant

Body Shaming | Part 1

What even is a 'perfect body'? Who decides what that is? Everybody has a different perception of perfection. What one person sees as unattractive, could be somebody else's ideal. I think my sister is perfect, I think certain shoes are perfect, some days to me are perfect, drinks, food but not everybody has the same opinions as me and could see what I see as perfect as complete shit, but that's irreverent to me because I think it's perfect. It doesn't matter what other people think about your physique, if you are happy with yourself, that's all that matters and if you're not, change it? I know for some people you can't physically/emotionally but then you need to learn to love yourself because you are more important than anything else. You do not need to change yourself for anybody ever.

It is so easy to judge people, say hateful things without even realising that your words could really put them down. People on the internet are always dragging people down, It is not OK, it will never be OK to publicly shame somebody for their appearance. The media are to blame for the amount of shaming there is. Comparing older celebrities who have had children to these young, fresh on the scene celebs is completely wrong. labeling somebody as 'fat' because she hasn't got a completely flat stomach, what is that? People tweeting celebrities saying how awful they look because they haven't got super thin legs, or whatever. People are people. Everybody is different but were all the same in the way that if somebody calls out on your insecurites it hurts.

Why is it that no matter what size you are, somebody has something to criticise you for? Everybody nowadays is so judgmental. I haven't a clue why but it should seriously stop. And it's not just guys shaming girls, it's girls against girls, girls shaming guys and then guys vs guys. Why is it anybodies place to say anything about YOUR body. Do people shame people because they aren't happy with their own appearance, so it's only right to make somebody feel  as bad as you do? It's not OK.

I have more to say about this topic and will write about it again in the near future.

Let me know what you think. Thanks for reading.

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:

INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant

TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant

Saying NO

I've seen this a lot recently on various social media, how people are getting shamed for saying no to guys. It really frustrates me. It's so much easier to lie and say you're in a relationship than to say ''No sorry, I'm not interested''. Because when you say 'no' you usually get the 'oh why not', 'let me take you out anyway' or the short and sweet, 'bitch'. Or whatever but when you say that you're seeing someone else people tend to back off. And it's crap that you have to lie to these people to tell them no. I know I'm not the only person who uses it as an excuse, although it may seem like a low blow and a rude thing to do, you don't have to put up the shit they give you after you have said no. I appreciate that it takes balls to ask somebody out, and it's mostly flattering but if I wanna say no, leave it there. 

'''I have a boyfriend' is the easiest way to get a man to leave you alone. Because he respects another man more than you''

I was on holiday in Greece earlier this year I made great friends with group people that were staying in our apartment block. At a club one night these two guys tried talking to me and my friend. I'm usually a great judge of character (if I do say so myself) I instantly knew what type of people they were, I didn't want to talk to them at all because as I knew what their intentions were when talking to us. I was not interested in the slightest. So when they tried it on with me, I declined I got all this crap questioning me as to why I wasn't interested. And yeah okay, I get you wanna know why but don't hassle me and make me feel like I'm a shitty person. If I said no, then no? I said he wasn't my type and I don't fancy him like in the nicest way possible, but this guy was obviously so full of himself and a complete dickhead that he wouldn't stop because he clearly thought he was good enough to carry on. One of the friends we made saw that I was uncomfortable in the situation and came over and said 'are you okay?' I responded 'Yeah I'm fine, let's go though'. And this piece of shit guy said ''oh is this your type then, fat and ugly?' and in that split second he epitomised exactly the type of guy I thought he was. It was so fucking unattractive and disgusting that someone could openly say that to somebody else. I felt so awful like it was my fault that he had had that said to him. There was nothing wrong with our friend and he wasn't fat nor was he ugly but this twat obviously thought he was way better than everyone else. It was so harsh I could've cried with anger and it still infuriates me months later.

Just because somebody may be attracted to you does not mean that you have to be attracted back. It makes me so mad that sometimes you're made to feel obliged to like somebody back. If it's made clear that someone is not interested, don't continue in trying to pursue that person. Talking to guys makes me feel insecure and uncomfortable. I don't really like going anywhere alone because I get heckled or whistled at and that makes me feel very uneasy. I do think it's sad that you have to lie to these people because it is easier than saying 'no' and it shouldn't be like that. 

P.S: If you are one of those guys who after I've said I have a boyfriend say ''Would you cheat on him'' please, go to hell, you are shit.

NO means NO.

Thanks for reading.

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant

TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant

Same Sex Relationships

I watched a video a while back of a man suggesting how absurd it would be if schools were to teach children about gay relationships in Religious Studies or whatever lesson. It was really disgusting,the way he spoke about it, like it would poisoning young children, that we’d be implying that being with the same sex is normal. What he was saying was really offensive and VERY discriminating. He was clearly severely homophobic (although he denied that).

I then thought to myself  when I was younger I remember seeing same sex couple and thinking that it was wrong, because I'd never seen it before (I regret that now). But back then I didn’t understand that not everybody is the same and they didn’t have to be. I think now, that it should be compulsory to educate children on the topic. People are so against gay relationships because they’ve only been shown one way. People are afraid to say they’re attracted to the same sex because people are only taught that men and women should be together.  It’s so wrong that peoples feelings are suppressed due to social norms. It should change rapidly. I want my children (when I/If I have them) to be happy with who they love and feel comfortable with their sexuality, not anxious and worried of what others will think. Society will collapse in the future if people continue to look down on same sex couples and people are never told that it’s okay to be gay. It’s wrong on so many levels.

I think it is funny how 'gay' was/is used as a insult, I remember when I was younger replying to this with ''Gay means happy'' and I was right, I guess. I am straight, however I know what love is, and I know that if you are in a same sex relationship it must make you happy, so be it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being attracted to the same sex. You are who you are. It makes me sick that people have ended their beautiful lives because of the fear of people opinions/reaction to their sexuality. People should not have their emotions eat them up because society tells them that their feelings are corrupt. 

I think my generation is much more understanding of homosexuals however there is still a long way to go. You're a shitty person if you look at somebody differently, or your opinions change because somebody is dating somebody of the same sex. 

                                                   
Gay - ''light-hearted and carefree''

What's next?

Chloë X

Find me on my social media here:

INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/chloedurant
TWITTER: www.twitter.com/chloedurant